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family

My parents put so much pressure on me

It is always scary and overwhelming when a lot of pressure is put on you by your parents. Parents often think their children are capable of amazing things, and that can lead to the feeling of pressure. Have a conversation with your parents about how you are trying your best in whatever it may be (school, sports, etc.), but you have noticed yourself starting to get overwhelmed by how much pressure is on you. Try to take some time to figure out how exactly they put pressure on you. Do they never let you rest, do they always give you extra math problems to do, do they send you to extra tutoring that you do not need, etc.? Depending on the situation, thank your parents for their support, but tell them you need a little bit more space to be able to perform your best.

A helpful resource:

https://www.healthline.com/health/stress-and-family#takeaway

I got in a fight with my parents

It is always upsetting when you get into a fight with family members. What caused the fight? Was it about school, sports, curfew, etc.? Oftentimes fights occur because people have two different viewpoints or do not agree on something. Take some time to think about the fight and what angle you were coming from, but also what angle your parents were coming from. Remember that almost always, parents always want what is best for their children, so they were probably coming from a place of good intention. However, take some time to think about what you want to say and try to have a calmer conversation with them about the topic. Say something like I understand you think X, and I respect that, but I think Y because… .

I feel invisible at home

No one should ever feel invisible at their home. Take some time to think about why this might be the case, and then try to have a conversation with the people in your home who are making you feel invisible. Chances are, something might be going on with them; it likely has nothing to do with you as a person! I remember when my brother was getting in trouble frequently at school, I felt like I got zero attention from my parents. Explain why you feel the way that you do, and if you and your family members can come up with a plan to fix the issue that would be best. If it is not possible for you to talk to those who are making you feel invisible, find comfort through your friends, siblings or other family members to realize this is not a problem with you. If this is a serious issue, please reach out to a trusted adult, like a school counselor.

A helpful resource:

https://www.healthline.com/health/toxic-family

My parents are very strict and won’t let me do anything my friends are allowed to do

As much as it stinks, every set of parents have different rules for their children. Try to come up with a compromise with your parents. When I was in high school, my parents were not comfortable with me going into New York City alone with my friends. I explained the situation, and eventually we came up with a compromise that allowed all of us to feel happy and safe. For instance, if all of your friends are allowed to go to the beach without a parent but you are not, ask about some different options. Maybe your parents can drive you and stay in the area until it is time to go home. Maybe you can share your location with your parents for the day so they know exactly where you are. Maybe you can go to the beach for a shorter amount of time. Instead of getting into an argument, try to have a civil conversation with your parents about possible options to make both parties happy.

A helpful resource:

https://www.healthline.com/health/why-do-my-parents-hate-me

I got into a fight with my sibling(s)

I have gotten into plenty of fights with my siblings, whether it be about sharing clothes, who was putting the dishes away or who was taking the dog for a walk. However, it always ended up being something we could laugh about a few days later that was not that serious. Of course it is always upsetting when you get into a fight with family members. Odds are, you guys fought about something silly, like me. If you look back in a year, you likely will not remember what this fight was about. Collect your thoughts and then make an effort to speak with your siblings and let them know you are upset that you got into a fight. Exchange apologies if they are genuine and mutual. If the fight was about something more serious, it might be best to make your parents aware of the situation and have them intervene, but not go to them in sort of a “snitch” way.

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