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relationships

My boyfriend / girlfriend / partner broke up with me

It is always upsetting when a relationship comes to an end. I remember when my boyfriend broke up with me in high school, and I was totally distraught. However, each week I started to feel better and after a few months I really was okay. While I still missed him, I understood that chapter of my life was over and I was finally excited and hopeful about what was to come. You might start to blame people, but don’t be hard on yourself. Remember, what is meant to happen will happen, as cheesy as that is to say. Spend time grieving the end of the relationship, but look forward to what’s to come in the future. Your person is out there, and when the right time comes, you will meet them! Keep yourself busy during this hard time by doing things that make you happy or spending time with family and friends!

A helpful resource:

https://www.healthline.com/health/what-to-do-after-a-breakup#boundaries

The boy / girl I have a crush on will never notice me

It stinks to feel like you are not being noticed by those you really want to be noticed by. The person might not have any idea you are interested in them, so if you really care about them, maybe ask them for their number or ask them if they want to get coffee. One time my friend was really into a guy, but she felt that he never even looked her way! Finally, she worked up the courage to ask him for his number and they hit it off! They started dating and she always says how thankful she is that she went up to him first! Although it can be hard sometimes, it is so worth it to put yourself out there for people you think you are interested in! If you do not feel comfortable doing that, and your crush still is not noticing you, it might be worth it to put your time and energy into someone who does notice you. It is cliche, but someone who you are meant to be friends with or date will come around and notice you right away!

I got into a fight with my boyfriend/girlfriend/partner

It is never fun to get into a fight with those you care about. Take some time to think about the fight and what you would like to say to them when you next see each other. Hopefully, both of you would come back to one another, give sincere apologies and learn a lesson. One fight does not mean you need to break up with your significant other, but if it is a continual, toxic thing that keeps happening, then a break up might be something to consider. Here is an article about some specific red flags that can be seen in relationships. If any of your fights are centering around these topics over and over, it might be time to have a serious conversation with your significant other. Check out OneLove in our resources if you are really struggling or unsure about anything, and if you are in serious danger use their hotline or seek immediate help from someone not involved in the relationship.

A helpful resource:

https://www.teenhealth101.org/post/red-flags-in-relationships

My only friend got a significant other and I feel left behind

Do you feel left behind because you do not have a significant other or because your friend is not spending as much time with you?  If you do not have a significant other, give yourself time. The right person will come into your life when you least expect it. If you feel you are losing your friend to their new significant other, your friend is likely losing track of time and being swept up by everything “new.” Give them some time to figure everything out. If things are not getting better, reach out and say how you are so happy for your friend, but you really miss spending time with them. Try to come up with a concrete plan of spending time together that both you and your friend can look forward to. I remember when one of my good friends got a boyfriend, I did not get to see her as much. However, after a few months, she realized how much time she was spending with her boyfriend, and not with me, and she made a huge effort to hang out with me more, which I appreciated! I gave her the time and space she needed, and when she realized she needed to change I was right there waiting for her.

My boyfriend/girlfriend/partner cheated on me

This is always a situation that really, really hurts. I am so sorry you are going through this. It is up to you whether you want to give them a second chance or end the relationship right then and there; do not let anyone tell you what to do. However, they say, “once a cheater always a cheater,” so it might be worth moving on and taking the time to wait for the perfect person to walk into your life. Do not settle for any less than you deserve, and understand cheating in a relationship is not a quality you want your partner to possess. It really can be hard to let go of the person who cheated on you, but remember you are likely saving yourself from a lot of heartbreak down the road.

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